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Roles and Whatnot

October 10, 2007

I was thinking about roles last evening. We were on our own for the church meeting (the kids and me) as Daddy had to work and bring home that bacon. I was feeling pretty proud of myself for taking my well-behaved children out to Wendy’s and ordering a salad instead of a burger. I was really proud when we were on time for the meeting and still more pleased that the kids were content and quiet and I didn’t really have to do any disciplining to speak of. Look at what I accomplished last night. I had both kids into pajamas, brushed up and then into beds within 20 minutes of arriving home, not to mention that they voluntarily picked up their toys in that same time span. I really have it together and I just want everyone to know that. So, thank you and good night.

WAIT! Don’t go…what I really want to say is this: I think the reason I had such an easy time of it was because of the one person who wasn’t there with us. Okay… still not coming out right.

I’m trying to appreciate my husband, here. I’m trying to say that because of his leadership on a daily basis, we can survive when we’re going it alone. (For a while) He is involved, and I am so glad. How easy would it be for me to have this place running like a top if I always had my plans in action? Pretty darn. How boring would that be, though? And how debilitating for my husband, the man I put myself under in the sight of God. I was just thinking about what I missed out on. Sure, we were home and in bed at a decent hour, but I missed hearing my husband joke with the kids and talk about theology and life with the other men from our assembly after the meeting. I missed the relaxing ride home and all the thoughtful chatter that usually encompasses our jaunts to and from wherever. We all missed out on bedtime shenanigans that are a part of these kids’ childhoods, all for the sake of my trying to be efficient. (Not that this is always a bad thing, in my own defense.)

It would be so easy, each day, to jump into a leadership role in order to keep things running properly–to bark out orders to the kids and expect my man to jump right in and help to execute said commands. Easy for me, maybe, but then my husband’s job would be so much harder. How can a man lead when he is fighting for control? In his own home, no less! And, what kind of picture would that paint for my son? What kind of a wife would I be modeling to him? What kind of man would I be producing? A leader? Or a man who is afraid to be in charge for fear of doing it the wrong way? Or too lazy to lead because someone else is willing to do it?

What we have works, even though we are not always on time and the kids sometimes stay up later than I think they should. And I’m not by any means saying that I have it all together or that I have it all figured out. I’m saying that I have a great husband who is easy to submit to. He is usually really in tune to when I am feeling stressed about keeping things running smoothly and starts making things happen. He also lets me know when I should lighten up a little.

It can be a struggle sometimes, but I like my role and I really don’t ever want to abuse it. I think also, though, that the deceiver wants women to struggle in these areas. He knows that we want control so he makes it so easy for us to give in to the temptation of taking over. I hope all of that makes sense. I feel like a lot of times I have a good thought, but it comes out distorted or just lacking in continuity somehow. Anyway, it made sense to me.

Any thoughts?

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Josiah permalink
    November 9, 2007 8:44 pm

    Thanks, again, for the reminder and the encouragement! We sure do have great men. On a different note…you sure do blog a lot…or maybe I just don’t read enough. It’s taken me a half and hour to catch up just on YOUR blog!! Maybe one day I’ll e-mail again 🙂 Jessi

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