Letting Go
I’m beginning to realize that I just can’t do it all (gasp!) I’m finding that there is just going to have to be a new normal around here. This weekend was a great testimony to that fact. I had so many plans for making Resurrection Day really special this year. (and it WAS a great day for us, just different than I had envisioned.)
I don’t know about any of you, but if I’m not careful, I start comparing myself to others, as a mother, as a wife, as an educator of my children…you get the point. This year I have been comparing myself to myself and how things were around here last year (when I wasn’t nursing an infant and schooling my children in an official capacity, not to mention keeping a house and making it a home.) It’s such an unhealthy way of thinking and we all need to be reminded of just how unhealthy it is every now and then. All week long I have been bombarded with encouraging words from friends and loved ones. It’s all stuff I’ve heard before and even said to other moms from time to time. Somehow it’s just different when you find yourself in “the thick of it.” Take Rebecca for instance. The pictures in this post say it all, but the caption drives home the point: she enjoys her children and their messes. She doesn’t seem to get way-laid by things that just aren’t that important in the scheme of things. (and she is constantly reminding me to enjoy every moment and to relax) Bravo, sister. So here I am, trying to find our new normal and learning how to let some things go for the time being.
The funny thing is, even though I got by on just the bare minimum (by my standards) this weekend, I think my children have a better grasp of Easter than ever before, thanks to everyone around me. My husband spent so much time with them this year, explaining the big picture and preparing their minds for this Holy Day during the weeks prior. I was completely blessed by other families around me and how they celebrated. It’s always encouraging to be inspired by the creativity of other moms. (This post is on the long-ish side, but it’s uplifting and has great pics–for moms with young kiddos, just read #11 on the list–such sound advice, and it hits home for me right now)
I’m sure this blog doesn’t always paint a realistic picture of life around here. I like to post about the good stuff: the things that make life beautiful like children and family and beauty all around us. I like to keep you in the loop about the things we enjoy in the midst of our chaos. The fact of the matter is that it’s not always sunshine and roses and perfection (okay, it’s NEVER perfection!) I get behind in my house work and I fuss at the kids and I’m not always at the top of my game in the wife department. So there you have it. The honest truth.
Thinking on these things today:
4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. 9 What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.
Philippians 4:4-
Gina G. Smith 
Sometimes we can compare ourselves to other women, and we can think, “Why can’t I just get it together and be more like them?” Sometimes we can compare ourselves to other women, and we can think, “At least I’m not as out of it as she is!” You’re exactly right, we have to find a new normal every now and again. And typically, our normal will never be the same normal as any of our other peers…so why compare it? When you have a past like mine, you tend to be really insecure about it, and compare yourself constantly to those who “did it the right way”…I pray God continues to free me from the bondage of those thoughts! Great Post!
It is so wrong to compare you to other people. And silly. You’re way better.
Be encouraged sister. There is no new normal. As soon as the new becomes normal, it will move into another new, then normal, and so on and so on and so on.Kids keep us off balance, and it’s a great way to remember that we are not in possession of the control we think we are.The third one changes everything…
After Annabell was born I struggled with getting stuff done, and I kept asking God for help. Meanwhile, everyone and their brother was asking how they could help. I was expecting God to give me forty hours in a day so that I could get stuff done myself so I didn’t see God’s provision. Man I was an idiot!!! Eventually, I got it; and a great couple came over to help. He got my colicy baby to relax, and she helped get my house back in order. I slept. It was great. The point to all of this is your not alone. Not only have others walked the same path, but God is always willing to provide. Thanks for your honesty so that others will learn hopefully quicker than I did:)
Gina, I just checked out your blog and had to go change the title of the post I just finished as it was exactly the same as yours! Sounds like we are both feeling the same way here lately. I know you’ve heard me say it before, but that third one packs a punch. I’m finding that children grow up too fast to waste time comparing our selves to other moms. We just need reminders now and then, and great friends who are honest and genuine.
thanks for even more encouragement, everyone! sometimes you just can’t hear things enough before they start to sink in. it certainly is a journey worth taking, though.
Thanks for encouraging me, Gina! I remember my mom saying lots of the same things we are saying when my siblings and I were growing up. We have wonderful memories and are incredibly thankful that our parents focused on what was important and let other stuff go (although we all know that they’re far from perfect!). Grace abounds.
Thanks for the encouragement! Sometimes it’s so hard for me to adjust to life’s changes. Thanks for helping me get a fresh perspective.